conor pall

FAMILY VIOLENCE SURVIVOR, ADVOCATE & AUTHOR

My Book

CONOR'S DEBUT BOOK

My Story

THIS IS CONOR'S STORY

Conor is a young person shaking up the family violence system, determined to use his lived experience as a male survivor to drive change that matters in Victoria. As the current Victorian Victim Survivor's Advisory Council deputy chair, he is using his experiences to influence change in the way children and young people are seen as victim-survivors in their own right.

Hailing from Mildura, Conor was recognised for his commitment to the space when presented with a Victorian Young Achiever of the Year Award in 2022 and has evoked reform within the heart of the state’s justice system. Conor continues to advocate for a stand-alone family violence service for children and young people.

MORE ABOUT CONOR

#CONOR ON INSTA

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Thanks for having me @nswdcj 🫶

We must strengthen practice by centring children and young people so no one is left to carry their risk alone.

A cringe couple shoot to celebrate 3 years 💜✨

My message is more important than my circumstance.

It isn’t about me.

It’s about change, justice, and giving children and young people the opportunity to be heard.

Last week, at the National Family Safety Summit, I spoke up for my younger self.

A kid whose life, for many years, was caught up in The Shadow of family violence.

I talked of his strength and determination - to transform those dark days into change.

To break free from the brokenness that had been projected onto him.

I think it’s safe to say I did little me proud.

Men and boys, it’s our responsibility to hold ourselves compassionately accountable - to challenge violence, and break the cycle.

To choose to heal, to love and to be different.

To turn the cycle that is, into the cycle that was.

The past 16 days have been devastating.

The past year has been harrowing.

We need to bound together as advocates, professionals and as humans to make sure this national crisis gets the attention it needs.

And in the advocacy we’re doing, let’s not forget about children and young people.

It was a great opportunity to attend the South Australian Royal Commission Youth Summit, making sure children and young people’s experiences and solutions are front and centre.

Their voices matter - and they deserve to be seen, heard and supported.

Today, I had the honor of sitting alongside 14 incredible women and Her Majesty Queen Camilla to discuss the crisis of family violence in Australia.

When I spoke, I reflected upon the children and young people who are still waiting to be seen, heard, and protected.

I spoke about the years I felt invisible, about the systems that overlooked me, and about the strength it took for my mum to fight for our safety.

I shared my story not for myself, but for the children whose voices are still being overlooked.

When I wrote ‘The Shadow that Follows’, I thought about all the children who, like me, have lived with The Shadow that is family violence.

I remember the constant fear. The feeling that no matter what I did, my family and I would never feel safe.

No child should ever have to grow up feeling that way.

This book is for them. It’s for every child who needs hope, who needs to know their life can and should be free from fear.

That’s why this story matters so much to me. It’s what I needed to hear when I was a kid.

Help me get the book to those who need it - it can be purchased via the link in my bio. 💜

#familyviolence #survivor

I’ve been reflecting on this year’s theme for National Child Protection Week, “every conversation matters.”

To me, it’s not just about having conversations with children and young people - it’s about what happens next. Or what doesn’t happen.

We know that overwhelmingly it takes multiple disclosures from a child for the adults around them to act.

And while adults talk and deliberate, children wait. They suffer in silence, like I did after disclosing for the first time.

When I mustered the bravery to speak my truth, nothing changed. To me, that conversation didn’t matter.

I challenge us all to move beyond having conversations.

Because children and young people don’t just need to be ‘heard’. We deserve to be believed and for the adults around us to honour our truth and act.

The reality too many children and young people face was front and centre at Domestic, Family and Sexual Violence Commissioner Michaela Cronin’s inaugural National Press Club address today.

As the Commissioner reminded us, the language we use matters — but our actions speak even louder.

I look forward to continuing to work alongside the Commissioner and other young people to ensure we’re supported as victims in our own right.

It’s time to turn words into action.

It’s time to get this done.

After the scariest day of my life, my advocacy journey began five years ago today.

I started advocating because I was tired of my needs as a kid being overlooked, forgotten and ignored.

For months, I thought change looked like having a loud voice.

I know now that to be heard, you must first learn to listen.

Since my experiences of the service system at 16, we’ve come so far. Pockets of good practice show the system is starting to acknowledge the unique experiences of children and young people.

But, we deserve more than acknowledgement.

I won’t stop fighting alongside other advocates until we’re truly serviced as victims in our own right.

And just a friendly reminder to organisations and leaders in the space; you can’t figure out how to adequately service the needs of children and young people without our input.

*pictured is curly haired, 16-year-old Conor*

Last week I had the pleasure of attending the launch of the @uppermurrayfamilycare Strategic Plan.

It places children and young people at the centre of our efforts to prevent the intergenerational cycle of family violence.

Place-based supports are the answer to creating communities where all children and young people are cared for.

📸: North South Media

I was with @jacintaallanmp, @vicki_ward_mp, @jaclynsymesmp and @nataliehutchinsmp today as they announced a new package to continue Victoria’s world leading work to end family violence.

It includes reform across FVIO and family violence safety notices, continued cultural shifts through Respectful Relationships in schools, and will deliver increased therapeutic supports for victim survivors of all ages.

We still have so much ahead of us as the consultation continues and bills are drafted to legislate these changes.

We must continue our work until all of us can live safely in our homes.

Today the chair of the Victim Survivors’ Advisory Council and I met with Premier Jacinta Allan and Minister Vicki Ward.

We talked about the role of the judicial system in protecting and upholding the rights of victim-survivors.

We discussed the need to include children and young people in the national conversations we’re having around family violence.

Most importantly, we highlighted the integral role of lived experience in our response to the crisis of male violence.

We’ll keep advocating with all survivors in Victoria until we’re all safe and free.

How is the family violence system helping young boys to heal and recover from the intergenerational impacts of violence?

How are we stopping this cycle from continuing?

Let’s not loose the experiences of children and young people in the conversations that are being had about male violence.

My book is in all Orange Door services across the state from today.

The thought that it might help one kid means so much to me.

Because it only takes one conversation to change a life.

Home should be a safe place for all children and young people - but for too many, it’s not.

That’s why I’m joining over thousands of people across the country to support the Home Time campaign.

With family violence being one of the leading causes of youth homelessness, ‘Home Time’ calls on the Federal Government to invest in a national dedicated pool of tenancies for young people.

It’s a common sense solution.

I encourage you to visit hometime.org.au/takeaction and send a message to your local politicians that children and young people experiencing homelessness should be a national priority.

Yesterday was the most rewarding part of my journey in becoming ‘Conor Pall’ - the survivor, not the victim.

I had the opportunity, thanks to Jade Benham, to talk to grade 5/6 learners in the Mallee about my book, and how all people have the right to safety. It’s a message I wish was talked about more when I was their age.

They were inquisitive, caring and thoughtful.

I reminded them that it only takes one person to stand against The Shadow - and anyone can be that person.

It was an honour to chat to you all!

I might be prouder of me… than I ever have been 🤍

This year has been massive.

Planting seeds of change within thousands of people across Victoria - from all walks of life.

I’m so honoured to do the work I do and use what has happened to me as my super power.

In 2024, let’s continue our work, and put an end to The Shadow that is family violence.

I got to visit @melbcitymission this week to drop off 100 copies of my book, The Shadow that Follows.

Thanks to the incredible support from the team at MCM, the books will go into refuges, schools and early childhood education settings across Melbourne.

Children and young people will get this resource at a time in their lives where the world may feel as though it’s crumbling around them - and be given a message of hope, love and resilience.

A message I needed when I was a kid.

So thank you, MCM, for your support in getting this book out to the people who need it most. 🧡💜💚

#familyviolence #familyviolenceresource #survivor #childrensbook #breakthecycle

CHRISTMAS SALE 🎄

Why not buy a copy of ‘The Shadow that Follows’ to gift a family member, friend or yourself this festive season?

I’ve popped a 25% off discount up on my site, with limited stock! 🎅

conorpall.com

#familyviolence #education #resource #survivor #christmas #book

We need to be BOLD in our fight to end family violence! 🧡 #WAFV2023 #WhyWeWalk

Come on, men and boys; step up, stand up, speak out!

And let’s together stop this epidemic and turn the cycle that is, into the cycle that was. 🧡

#wafv2023 #WhyWeWalk

On Friday, the Mildura community overwhelmingly said “no” to all forms of violence.

We stood in solidarity with all victim-survivors and stood against the shadow.

Because everyone has the right to safety and freedom.

#familyviolence #survivor #walkagainstfamilyviolence #walkagainstviolence #community #mildura

I jumped at the chance to drop a book off to @jelliotmp at Parliament House while I’m in Canberra!

It’s the first time I’ve met the Assistant Minister for the Prevention of Family Violence but I’m sure it won’t be the last.

Thanks Assistant Minister!

#familyviolence #survivor #theshadowthatfollows #reform #education

Moments from the launch ✨

Still reminiscing about my favourite day with my favourite people!

#childrensbook #survivor #familyviolence #educationresource #breakthecycle

Great to have the support of our new Minister for the Prevention of Family Violence @vicki_ward_mp who has secured her copy of the book!

MPs from across Victoria also received copies today thanks to the support of @respectvictoria who marked 5 years of integral prevention work at Parliament House.

See you on the steps of parliament this November 24. 🧡🤍

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#CONOR ON INSTA

@conor.pall

conor pall

CONOR'S DEBUT BOOK

THIS IS CONOR'S STORY

#CONOR ON INSTA

#CONOR ON INSTA

DOING WITH A PURPOSE

CONOR WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU

conor pall

CONOR'S DEBUT BOOK

THIS IS CONOR'S STORY

#CONOR ON INSTA

​

#CONOR ON INSTA

DOING WITH A PURPOSE

CONOR WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU